Here it is, the all-purpose generic helmet thread post, courtesy of Norman Carr and rec.humor.funny
It would appear that the 'Great Helmet Debate' is not going to go
away in a hurry, so may I therefore suggest that in the future anyone
wishing to post on this subject makes use of the following all-
purpose form to register their opinion. Simply edit as required
then post, no more composing erudite rebuttals of the other chaps
point of view necessary!
Handy helmet opinion registration form:
[I / my (boy/girl)friend / child / cat / (other) _______ ] [was / were]
[cycling / driving / walking the dog] the other day. It was
[light / dark / sunny / raining / snowing] when [I / they] collided with a
[car / bus / truck / other cyclist / tree / the ground / item of street
furniture / (other)] ________ which hit [me / them] [from behind / head
on / from the side / from above / from below]. [I / they] [was / were]
[travelling at ____ Km/h / ____ mph / stationary] at the time and [I / they]
landed [head first / _____ first]. The ______ which hit [me / them] was
[trying to avoid an accident / silly / stupid / drunk / asleep / insane].
There was [nothing / something] [I / they] could do to avoid the collision
and it was [partly / entirely] [my / their] fault.
[I / they] suffered [no injuries / minor head injuries / minor injuries (not
head) / permanent disablement / brain damage / death]. Boy, am I glad
[I / they] [was / were] [wearing / not wearing] a helmet.
I think this experience makes it obvious that it [should / should not]
be a legal requirement for [everyone / nobody / people below the age of
consent / experienced cyclists / novice cyclists / drivers / pedestrians
/ people walking dogs / dogs / bus drivers / people with inadequate
medical insurance / trees] to [always / sometimes / ocassionally / never]
wear a helmet when [on the road / off road / popping down to the shops /
in the supermarket / cooking / using stairs / in bed].
Furthermore, I [have / do not have] the statistics to prove it. Thus,
anyone who disagrees with me is [free to do as they please / entitled
to their opinion / misguided / stupid / mad / a danger to democratic
civilisation].
I hope you all find this a useful contribution to the debate.
Happy cycling [with / without] helmet,
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